Were You Conscious?

I can see clearly now the rain has gone. ~Johnny Nash

I see a number of clients in my work as a coach and an intuitive. I also talk and share with family and friends - what's the phrase, I hold the space. I like the sound of it. I know it's used by lots of people and it can have an 'ick' factor, but the bottom line is, the act of being present, letting the moment be, not expanding too fast or having the walls close in and suffocate, is something I find that I do. It’s a gift. A gift that I receive and one that I give. I feel peaceful when I do this. I do this for clients, for family, for friends.

So, this is a story about one particular friend - Bob. I have held the space for Bob on more than one occasion. Actually, Bob has shown up more than once in my writing. I have interesting experiences and insights when I connect with him and he is generous about letting me share them in this way.

I have known Bob for the better part of 30 years. We went to college together. He and my husband Drew were roommates in college and his wife Colleen is my dearest friend. In each other weddings, the birth of children, work and family – all of it. Over 15 years ago, they bought the house next door to us, so we are best friends AND neighbors.


The stories I can tell.  But that's for another time. You get the idea.

One of the relevant pieces of the story is this: true or not, over the years as a foursome, I was the one who was likely to try out (or be tried) with a new experience in personal growth or development. Of the four of us, you could say that I was the engine on the train of new horizons, for better or for worse.

And if I am that engine, then Bob is the caboose.

I have a theory.  There are a whole lot of people waking up, having a shift in perception, becoming more conscious and this interests me. It happened to me in 2006. Now, it's clear to me that consciousness is contagious just like a radio tower  - it transmits. So, really, this is the story of the little engine that could because the caboose is now on board.

Read on.

Several weeks ago, I was doing that 'holding the space' thing with Bob because he had been laid up in bed with his back and things had taken a turn for the worse. He was clearly at a crossroads with what to do to relieve the pain and step back into his life. I won't go into all the details; suffice it to say that he had been dealing with this back issue for many, many months and tried all types and manner of treatment.

Well, I happen to be over at the house on a Wednesday night and sat down to visit with Bob in his bedroom. I did what I do as a coach. I asked questions when I was curious, we were quiet and restful when there was nothing to say and we listened as much with our hearts as our minds as we sat together. Bob had shared that the few days prior had been frustrating trying to make connections with doctors and get information. Bob sensed that there was something in all this frustration and resistance and was open to the idea that there was more to this experience than met the eye.

After we talked and he was in a quieter place, I went home. It was late in the evening and Bob went off to sleep. He called the next day to say he had what he thought was a dream and wanted to share it. In the dream, he was walking along what felt like a freeway and it was raining. He saw a really large freeway sign the said 'Exit Wounds.' Now, he told me, being laid up in bed all week, he had been watching tv and there is a Steven Segal movie called Exit Wounds. He wasn't sure if he had just pulled that in from the title of the movie. My hunch was it was more like the chicken and the egg experience. Let me explain.

God, Life, the Universe, the all that is, the source ( You pick) - doesn't speak English. It speaks in symbols and uses everything. Really, it is a very resourceful, intelligent and clever way to communicate. Much like we do when we talk with someone that doesn't speak our language. We use signs, symbols, non-verbal cues. So, in this capacity with Bob, I was acting as the translator, because I have had lots of these conversations at this point and I make a great sounding board.

So, Bob was really struck by the power of this sign – this vision. It felt so real. He said, "I don't know if I was awake or asleep." I sensed that this bothered him. That if he believed he was asleep, then none of this was real and he was still lost and unsure. If he believed he was awake, then his rational mind was there to understand it and he could take some action. But I sensed that he knew this was a dream, though clearly unlike any dream he had ever had before.

As I sat and listened, a question arose in me. I said to him, "Were you conscious?" I could tell the question caused him to pause, to breathe, to quiet, and he said "Yes, I was conscious." And I said, "then it doesn't really matter whether you were awake or asleep.”

"You didn't miss the sign.”

This all happened on a Thursday. On Friday, all the pieces fell into place and he met with a surgeon who had an opening on Monday. It all felt fast and kinda scary, but Bob trusted some deeper knowing to support his taking action… one step at a time. He had the surgery the following Monday.

Now, this isn't one of those and now he ran a marathon three days later stories. This is a much smaller, quieter miracle, yes, the ‘m’ word, miracle. Because, ladies and gentle-men, the caboose has left the station…the whole train is on the track. A new relationship is emerging for Bob - one with his greater self.

Now his steps are still slow, there is still pain, perhaps more wounds to exit. But he is on his way...one conscious moment at a time.