Sunday, July 24, 2011

Perspective



"This guy's walkin' down a street when he falls in a hole. The walls are so steep he can't get out. A doctor passes by and the guy shouts up, "Hey you! Can you help me out?" The doctor writes a prescription, throws it down in the hole, and moves on. Then a priest comes along and the guy shouts up, "Father, I'm down in this hole; can you help me out?" The priest writes out a prayer, throws it down in the hole and moves on. Then a friend walks by. "Hey, Joe, it's me. Can ya help me out?" And the friend jumps in the hole. Our guy says, "Are ya stupid? Now we're both down here." The friend says, "Yeah, but I've been down here before and I know the way out."
Leo McGarry (John Spencer)
The West Wing

I was a big fan of The West Wing.  Thanks to our digital age and reruns, I still am.  I watched the whole series again a few years ago and was reminded once again why I loved this show so much.  I won't go into all the superlatives because The West Wing is just the vehicle today. If you are not familiar with The West Wing, Leo McGarry tells this story to Josh Lyman in Episode #32 - Noel.  Josh is back to work after being shot by a stray bullet intended for the President and is experiencing post-traumatic stress. I could just write a post about my passion for The West Wing and my love for these fictional characters. However,  I am practicing today with the foreground-background process and I will keep all my adulation's about The West Wing in the background and draw your focus to the foreground - the quote above.

Each time I see this episode or read this quote, I find my eyes filling with tears.  My image is that my heart is so full, there must be a place for all that love, joy and hope to express itself.  Martha Beck, one of the master-full teachers in my life, has been quoted as saying 'we cry not because we have lost hope but because we have found it again.'  Well, this is a story about finding hope - in the friend and in our perspective.

It's the last line that gets me - every time.  "Yeah, but I been down here before and I know the way out." 

The story contrasts the doctor, the priest and the friend.  My hunch is that the doctor AND the priest have also been the friend.  There is a power in the word friend, a certain special color and tone.  It has an energy and we are free to fill in the blank with the who, what, where, when in our life that has been down there before and knows the way out. 

I am many things.  One of them is a life coach.  I discovered recently as I was writing a proposal to speak at  a seminar the true definition of 'life coach.'  In my fill in the blank sentence, LIFE was the friend, in all of its forms and literally showed me the way out.  I like to say LIFE was my first 'coach' and all the transformation that was set in motion, when I too fell in that hole with walls so steep I thought at times there was no way out.  Now, the falling in the hole experience is inevitable.  Inevitable.  What happens as a result...now that is the magic.

Life as my friend, instead of my enemy, jumped down in that hole and showed me the way out.  And in doing so, the shift in perception was profound. 

This major transformation occurred in my life back in 2006 and it has been amazing to experience the freedom in this new perspective - LIFE as friend.  Now, I wouldn't have said life was an enemy per se, just that there wasn't the ease and freedom, the play-full-ness, the joy. This led to the discovery of another new friend - TIME. Time continues to be both friend and teacher.   Turns out, falling in that hole was the best thing that ever happened to me.

Now, I invite you to shift your focus from reading the words to looking at the picture above.  I searched for a picture to represent the guy down the hole.  As I searched, I realized it was all in the perspective.  The thought of falling down the hole into the endless black abyss triggers every control mechanism in the book.    How far?  How deep?  It's dark - I can't see.  Is there anything to hold on to?  When will it stop?  What will happen when I land?  What will break and shatter?  Will I be able to put myself back together?  How will I get out? 

Does all of this sound familiar? 

Wait, does all of this feel familiar?

One can feel the anxiety mounting just reading all the questions.  Now, let's shift the perspective from looking down into that void to looking up.  Ah, the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel.  That is what struck me when I found this particular image.  Looking up into all that light. 

If one continues to shift perspective, the hole - the tunnel, looks like it is horizontal and not vertical - I can walk right out.

Talk about life as friend.


  

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Developing Intuition - A 21st Century Tool



Over the last several years, I have trained and launched an intuitive coaching practice.  I remember when I first began my studies, a word that returned again and again was tool.  I pictured this image of a carpenters tool belt with every imaginable tool available for my journey.  As I continue to use and develop intuition and intuitive insight, I saw the ability to ACT upon intuitive wisdom lead to some powerful changes in my life and for my clients.  I use the word 'lead' deliberately, as in lead-'her.'  The addition of the intuitive tool to build my life, to open up new pathways, first in my mind and then in my life, has been profound. 

There isn't anyone who doesn't possess this tool in their tool belt, but you may find that you just reach for that hammer each and every time.  Reflex.  See how many other tools are in the belt?

I was trained by Martha Beck and her amazing staff of coaches and this was a recent post of Martha's in O Magazine.  It is a great article with some wonderful exercises and insights.

http://www.oprah.com/spirit/Finding-Your-Inner-Voice-Developing-Intuition-Martha-Beck

Martha's article was timely.  I launched an intuitive coaching group through Meetup.com.  The link http://www.meetup.com/Be-Set-In-Motion-South-Bay-Intuitive-Coaching-Meetup-Group/.  The blend of intuition, energy work and life coaching has been powerful alchemy for me and I am hearing from participants, clients and friends that this blend is opening up their minds in unforeseen ways.  One of the very powerful means to opening up the mind is to ask questions.  In the Martha Beck training, there is a wonderful tool called the marmoset response.  Marmoset's are VERY curious creatures and Martha has a delightful way of sharing with humor and wisdom.  The marmoset response is very akin to the traditions of the eastern spiritual practices in asking questions and staying present through awareness.  Answers are never an endpoint, only the place from which more questions arise.

At the meetups, I encourage the group to ask questions and a great technique is to have a large supply of three by five cards on hand.  They are a great size with limited space that can help focus the minds question. This question was submitted by a participant at the June meetup.  He asked great questions and I took the card away and pondered.  I later emailed him my response.  I told him after I wrote him, that this would make a great post for the blog.  I have been meaning to post for the past few weeks, but when Martha's column was published this month, the timing to post was perfect.

Here was Question #1:


 What beliefs interfere with intuition?


Time: There are so many beliefs around time that can limit the ability to trust and act upon intuitive insight when we believe that time is linear and fixed.

Freedom: There are so many shared beliefs around our perceptions of the "shoulds" in life and the difference between "pain" and "suffering."

Religion: Depending on ones religious upbringing, there are shared beliefs that block acknowledgment around intuitive/physic experience.

Relationships and Self-Perception/Sense of Self: How we view ourselves and feel about ourselves; our sense of empowerment and trust in our own experiences. Do we tend to be leaders or followers? Have we been conditioned to accept shared agreements around what is real and what is imagined.

Cultural Norms/Societal Agreements: There is overlap in some of these categories, but cultural beliefs may impact acknowledgment of intuitive abilities and insights separate from religion.


And Question #2:

 What are some tip-offs that we might unconsciously have some of these beliefs?

Resistance/Struggling: I think this is a great "tip-off" that there is more to be examine than meets the "eye" so to speak. Whether resistance in mind or body, generally this is a clue and the "detective" in us can explore and ask more questions.

Recognizing patterns: Generally, if we are unconsciously connecting with our intuitive insights, but are not recognizing this, a tip-off may be to notice patterns, very much like your plane crashes experiences. Now, I don't know that the adage "everything comes in three's" is always apt, there can be a pattern to "3" that can draw awareness out of the unconscious and into recognition. Many individuals report experiences with digital clocks and seeing repeating patterns. This connects with the idea of sacred geometry and noticing balance and harmony in nature and ourselves where we might only see chaos and disorder.

Fatigue/Illness/Unusual body experiences: These may be a tip-off. Generally, our body has a great deal of information to share with us and we have some shared beliefs around the mind being the wise center that knows all and thus the body is often "disbelieved."

I welcome input and comments on other blocks or beliefs that you have noticed that interfere with your ability to use intuitive wisdom and insight and take action. 
 
What's in your tool belt?