Yesterday was a funky day...and I know NO one here has ever had one of those! More and more though, the feeling out of sorts, not "self" days, happen less and less, so when this kind of day arrives, I pay attention. Now, don't get me wrong, there is still the part that is agitated, worked-up, unsettled and unhappy, but there is always this other part that is aware-watching, listening and learning.Side-Bar: I just looked up "funky" because I wondered why I choose this word to describe yesterday and of all the definitions, "old, musty, strange" fit the bill...and here's my hunch why.
There has been a lot of new in my life the last several weeks, new work, new clients, new office and new in family life...new schools, new opportunities and a lot of new possibilities. And in the last several weeks, with all this creating and working with new people, I "forgot" where the "entrance" to me is...entering into new lives, relationships, work contracts has so many doorways opened up that I missed my entrance; that place that feels calm, centered and peaceful even when all the doorways are open. I notice this yesterday because the whole day was "open", not one appointment on the calendar and there was a restlessness in this quiet, an agitation. It ended up being a day of cleaning and I am grateful for the image of all that "cleaning." I scrubbed the grout in the kitchen tile, cleaned up the recycling bins, scooped dog poop, vacuumed and washed the walls in the stairwell. It is interesting that so many insights come while vacuuming! I've had this experience before...and as I vacuumed and washed, I imagined the same experience in my mind and body and spirit! The "vacuum" of the day was an effective "vacuum" and I sense that a lot was cleaned without my THINKING about it!
I feel refreshed today and full of my own energy. Each has there own value. The not "comfortable in my own skin" day yesterday was an experience in feeling and sensing and just being.
Turns out that it was a "funky" day for a lot of other people yesterday! Glad that so much "cleaning and sorting" out is taking place for so many.
And if you are having a funky sort of day today...stop and check where the entrance is...and if it is next door - walk home!
I live a lot of open days where there is nothing scheduled. The openness has the feeling of the vastness of space experience that I had. Nothing to focus on, hold onto,identify with. Some days that is OK. Other days it is scary. It is Pema's uncertainty. And I practice with just being with what happens whether fear or comfort.
ReplyDeleteI find I am not getting the bit about the entrance door and the walking home. Say more.