Entrance Next Door

Yesterday was a funky day...and I know NO one here has ever had one of those! More and more though, the feeling out of sorts, not "self" days, happen less and less, so when this kind of day arrives, I pay attention. Now, don't get me wrong, there is still the part that is agitated, worked-up, unsettled and unhappy, but there is always this other part that is aware-watching, listening and learning.

Side-Bar: I just looked up "funky" because I wondered why I choose this word to describe yesterday and of all the definitions, "old, musty, strange" fit the bill...and here's my hunch why.

There has been a lot of new in my life the last several weeks, new work, new clients, new office and new in family life...new schools, new opportunities and a lot of new possibilities. And in the last several weeks, with all this creating and working with new people, I "forgot" where the "entrance" to me is...entering into new lives, relationships, work contracts has so many doorways opened up that I missed my entrance; that place that feels calm, centered and peaceful even when all the doorways are open. I notice this yesterday because the whole day was "open", not one appointment on the calendar and there was a restlessness in this quiet, an agitation. It ended up being a day of cleaning and I am grateful for the image of all that "cleaning." I scrubbed the grout in the kitchen tile, cleaned up the recycling bins, scooped dog poop, vacuumed and washed the walls in the stairwell. It is interesting that so many insights come while vacuuming! I've had this experience before...and as I vacuumed and washed, I imagined the same experience in my mind and body and spirit! The "vacuum" of the day was an effective "vacuum" and I sense that a lot was cleaned without my THINKING about it!

I feel refreshed today and full of my own energy. Each has there own value. The not "comfortable in my own skin" day yesterday was an experience in feeling and sensing and just being.

Turns out that it was a "funky" day for a lot of other people yesterday! Glad that so much "cleaning and sorting" out is taking place for so many.

And if you are having a funky sort of day today...stop and check where the entrance is...and if it is next door - walk home!

Going Up In Flames

I wanted to share this hilarious experience I had this evening because I think it is VERY familiar to so many people...it just shows up in different ways for different people.

OK, first client in the new office today at 5:30! SO exciting and happy to share the new space...it really came together BEYOND my wildest expectations and everyone has said such lovely things about the space. So, first client in the new space is one of my very first clients going back almost two years now. We were both tickled that she had the first appointment!

Now, setting the stage for the appointment: I LOVE to create the space for the session, I have had this ritual for several months...beautiful lighting, music and candles. The office looked lovely; the space warm and inviting. After the session, I blew out the candles and turned out the lights and walked out to the car with my client. I mentioned that I wanted to double-check the thermostat and bid her good-night and went back in for a second time to check everything again. I know about this "double-checking" thing with me because it has come up before when I am the one responsible for closing up. So, I re-check the whole office and then walk out, lock up the office, lock up the front gate and walk to me car again. I am STILL thinking about those candles...I know they are out, but what if they spontaneously combust because they had been lit just a little while ago. So, back in I go a third time and I fill a cup with water and sprinkle them, just a tad, so that I KNOW the non-existent flame has been doused. I lock the office, I lock the front gate, I get in the car and I am driving out of the parking lot when I make it three spaces down and pull in! AARRGGH, I feel crazy...I just can't pull out...I am laughing at myself and I close my eyes and get quiet and use my coaching tools and prayers, trust and let go...and I STILL can't leave. I think...I am not spending the night here! So, I go in for a fourth time armed with a box from the back of the car and I take all the candles I lit with me! Ah, the relief to the crazy control part of the brain that thinks, well, the candles you lit and blew out can't now re-lit themselves in the office all by themselves because now they will be with ME! OMG, it was really a hilarious and self-revealing experience.

I realize I have had this "fear" of causing an accidental fire for a long time...I just never really saw the whole picture clearly until tonight. This is a great metaphor for what has happened to me the last several years. Life has "set me on fire" and sometimes I am afraid of this awesome power...and that's OK! Because there are equally the times when I am "going up in flames" and I am curious, happy, blissful...when all the candles are burning!

So, am I lighting candles for the next session when I am the last one in the office? You betcha...because at the end of the day, I know I can take those beautiful "simmering just under the surface-I may burst into flames at any moment candles" home with me!

What is "going up in flames" in your life? What is "simmering" just below the surface of all that lovely control?

What's Blooming?

"A thing long expected takes the form of the unexpected when last it arrives."

~Mark Twain

I realized today as I was creating a syllabus for a four week course that I was CREATING! Where a half hour earlier, there was nothing concrete on the page, just the blank canvas, within that brief time, it all came together. I truly had the "ah ha" moment that this experience was a stepping stone to the larger experience of writing a book. The book will come in images, ideas and then words, paragraphs, pages, chapters. It will build over time, but today, the experience of writing the course outline showed me that the book is a dream that is rooted in a concrete foundation that is still unfolding. I am SO curious to see how this will happen...even though it will be happening to me, well through me!

I was inspired to create this course because I want to share more of the experience of sensing energy. It is something that I am passionate about. And information mingled with inspiration was available through me onto the page. It took time, energy, thought and creativity, but it happened, it exists on paper and starting next Tuesday, I will use this course outline to teach a four week class. And I am truly inspired to share more about intuition and how it speaks to us and guides and inspires and it will be exciting to put those ideas, stories and experiences to paper!

This radiant sense of blooming has been growing over the last several years, with innumerable challenges along the way. However, I knew deep within that this was unfolding, one petal at a time. There is that sense in awakening and being lived that the dance between resistance and release ebbs and flows. This is truly how "creativity" is born...through the release of resistance. Creativity isn't something we do, it is something that is done to us.

I love this picture of the orange chrysanthemums...it is a beautiful image of unfolding and radiantly blooming in the world. I have a dear friend, Lisa, who is assisting with creating my office space. She found the most wonderful images of chrysanthemums on a website called Dalidecals.com. They are removable decals and I think I will decorate one wall in the office with them! What better symbol for transformation than open, vibrant, blooming flowers!

So, to all today that are blooming, or tucked in a bud, or somewhere in between, may you discover through your own powerful experiences what is possible...what's blooming?