Sunday, August 14, 2011

A Cog In The Wheel

Below is a letter I just wrote to the participants in an offering I call The Intuitive Gym.  It was a brainstorm of an idea that showed up last May.  I launched as a summer experience to explore intuition and workout that piece (peace) of the amazing mind. I was moved to share what I wrote this morning on the blog because I want to.  As simple as that.   I am sharing on the blog because I am aware at this point that as I become more visible in the world, I am noticing the critic, the censor.  I notice that I write and then hold on to it.  A blog post sits in my edit pile, an email in the draft folder, a new idea for an offering in the file in my cognitive mind.  Ah, cog - only one of the pieces needed to keep the wheel in motion.  Now, let me share a bit about how I write.   As I was writing this little intro to the post below, which I wrote in my email a bit ago, I notice for the very first time 'cog' in cognitive.  This is how the mind perceives now.  Things pop out.   Especially words.  There are SO many brilliant clues in words.  So, I then pop on Dictionary.com and find the definition for 'cog.'  There are several but I notice this one and it feels true.  A  'person or thing playing a small part in a large organization or process.' A small part.  A cog in the wheel - not the whole wheel itself.  The larger organization is the mind, body and spirit, not just the cognitive, rational mind. So, life is inviting that even while I am expanding, being seen by more people, I am not going to censor - filter, yes - not censor.  So, like the It's Alive post, and The Intuitive Gym and this Cog in the Wheel post, I will learn by doing, by putting out the ideas, the blog, the emails, the offerings and learn from experience. 

So, here comes the uncensored stuff.  News at 11.

Email to The August Intuitive Gym Members - Sent on Sunday, August 14, 2011

Welcome to The Intuitive Gym,

Our first group session is Tuesday, August 16th from 4 pm to 5 pm PDT. Please RSVP so I know who will be live on the call. Even though the call will be recorded, the experience of attending and 'playing out' - (really, when you are in the sweet spot, feels much more like play than work), is where the opportunity for growth and change occur. Let me share a bit about my experience in my own intuitive gym and why this is my particular passion and how I coach and inspire others.

I like to say I was living a fairly conventional, stable, well-ordered balanced life as a mother, active parent volunteer, a worker bee in part-time positions for a variety of organizations. Then, in the summer of 2001, a few months before 9/11, I began to fall apart. What started as some routine numbness in my left foot and leg began a five year odyssey through the medical community and through the inner workings of my body, mind and ultimately my heart and spirit. In 2006, after exhausting the options through the Western medical community and one final conversation with a compassionate and wise neurologist, I went to see a marriage and family counselor. Now, I was reluctant to do this because I knew this wasn't all in my head...it was literally in my body and I wasn't able to grasp at the time how one could be set in motion by bringing all the parts of myself together instead of holding them separate in my mind. Sure, I had heard the term holistic and mindfulness and others such ideas, but that is what they were - intellectual ideas. I, like a lot of Americans, have a terrific logical mind - sharp, rational, orderly. Well, I was to discover that I had been cut-off from accessing a vital and valuable part of myself - the creative and intuitive mind. I was unconscious to how this mind - this beautiful mind - scared me because I had met it before and it was free, unpredictable, and brought what felt more like chaos than control into my life. So, I closed the door on this mind years before and call it fate, destiny, kismet, timing...whatever word fits, that door reopened. After six months exploring with this lovely, gentle and deeply intuitive counselor,  in the spring of 2006, a shift occurred in my life so deep and profound, that I literally woke-up to a new world, new body, mind and spirit - spring awakening. The experience of being guided through this non-linear, non-rational mind was so potent I began to take action and walk through deeply challenging experiences with a new found sense of peace and freedom - not always joy or happiness or bliss ( though they were there as well) - freedom. And now I am singing a new tune, a new anthem - let freedom ring.

So, this sets the stage for the Gym. Life was my first coach and it has been an empowering relationship. And that, my friends, both old ones and new, is how I came to be offering back the wisdom that came through this opportunity to wake-up to a new life. Over the last almost six years now, I have been re-made and have a new life - from the inside out.

First group call - Tuesday, August 16th from 4 pm - 5 pm. Show up - amazing things happen when we just show up. Schedule your one-on-ones. And don't be fooled by the price you paid for this experience. Life gives us opportunities all the time to show how we value an experience. So ask yourself, whether you pay $99 or $999 or $9999, life isn't concerned with the decimal point...imagine if you invest in this experience as if you paid your 'wait' in gold. Well, come along - because you did. You have a 24 karat gold experience ahead. ( a head - get it?) Life is so clever and funny. Come share a laugh or two.

Ask questions, be curious, notice, feel and experience with an open mind.

See you in the Gym,
Mary





Saturday, August 13, 2011

It's Alive

Zombie : Lots of Zombie hands reaching upwards, with blood splats.This is the first thought that popped into my head when I reflected on my current creative output. That old, funny monster movie expression - it's alive! The one that has that hint of hysteria around the edges as the chaos of the monster - the beast is unleashed. Well, I'm going to turn that concept right on its head because in this case the beast is a creative explosion of new classes, workshops, connections, clients and a feeling of being empowered like never before. Ok, let me break this down for you. 

Keeping in the theme of the horror film genre, though, I'm placing it strictly in the realm of those hilarious and slightly campy 50's B movies. The Creature from the Black Lagoon, The Blob and the classic Night of the Living Dead come to mind. Now, bear with me as my 'catching fire' mentality (remember my earlier post about ideas are contagious - catch some) well, I woke up with these cylinders firing and I am putting fingers to keys to share my particular brand of insight and albeit quirky humor.

Ok, so I am about to juxtapose spiritual awakening and 50's B horror movies - and they said it couldn't be done.

In contrast to my amazing technicolor dreamchair life at present, looking back, no - feeling back - I was one of those creatures from Night of the Living Dead.

A zombie.

Much better looking by the way, but still - dead.

Now, I would absolutely NOT have understood that at the time. I was living a seemingly stable, orderly - a few buttons undone life.

 And then the weirdness. This is what being spiritual awakened feels like - weird.  It's not what we think - it is never what we think.

And it is only in hindsight or as Martha Beck so beautifully notes - in telling the story backwards, that we can clearly see the truth unfolded. But during the unfolding - forget it. Fear and resistance so strong, that just like those zombies, I was possessed with a set of beliefs and conditions so powerful that they had literally sucked me dry and exhausted the hell out of me. And just like in the horror movies, as the monster approaches and goes in for the kill and depending on whether you are the star (keep that in mind) there is surrender and death. And then...rebirth. I know, it is a quirky analogy and I haven't thought through all the kinks but I think you get the basic hilarious premise.*

The monster, the demon, the creature from the black lagoon is inevitable.

Change is inevitable.

And what that change does is magical.

There is a brilliant tool that Martha Beck details in her book Finding Your Own North Star.  Next time, I'll spend some time sharing the change cycle.

But for today, just be aware of that one key phrase - change is inevitable. 

A new mantra.

A new perspective.

A new creature emerging from the depths - a new awakening from the dark night.  Because, reality is that the 'creature' is on both sides of the experience. Dead then alive, dead then alive, then alive, alive, alive!

*Practicing with the play and post concept for the blog today.  Just letting the quirky mind create...because it can.  All questions welcome.